I keep saying this, I need to get access to better clubs so that I can do more sets with less time in between. One thing that gives me pause is that I know it will be way easier to get myself in than do it with a wingman in tow. In the past I haven’t been able to function very well solo, but now that I’m starting to have good nights by myself I think it’s time to make this happen.
Anyways, last night was uneventful. Opened about ten sets but few of them went anywhere. We actually went to four different clubs and all of them were fucking horrible. 20% guys to 80% girls which is unusual. We blamed it on the weather. Fucking freezing, way too cold to go out. Walking to the club I was questioning my fucking sanity. Why the fuck am I going out right now and not watching a movie in bed like any rational human being?
One set of the night sticks out and I think a majority of the lessons come from it. It was the first set of the night, we were at the same club again. Open this girl standing by the bar, talk for about ten minutes. She’s into me but I want to check out other sets. As I go to leave she says “Stick around. I need to find you again, I think my friend might leave soon.” After that I’m fairly certain I can pull her. However, one thing leads to another and my wingman and I bounce around all over Williamsburg before finally coming back to the club 90 minutes later. The girl is still there. She approaches me, tells me her friend is gone. We dance for a minute, I say: “let’s go get Joe’s Pizza, I’m really hungry” she says “Not right now, but maybe soon” and so I drop it. Stop talking to her. She’s really not that cute and I’m not that interested. But still, if she came up and said “Ok, let’s go get Pizza” I would go and then pull her to my place. Never happens, she leaves. That’s the night.
Here’s the fuckup though. As a man I need to make the decision. Either I’m pulling her and doing everything in my power to make it happen, or I’m not pulling her and won’t even go with her if she says she wants pizza. Fuck that passive shit. In this case I was passive because she wasn’t really cute and I wasn’t that motivated. That’s OK, but I need to say the pull is not happening then no matter what, it’s done. Otherwise, if I’m thinking I don’t give a fuck, I just want to get laid tonight, then I’m going for the pull the same way as I would if she’s a 10. In the way you do one thing you do everything.
That was a fuckup, and I missed the chance to kiss her. I chickened out and didn’t do it even though I knew it was the right thing to do. Major sticking point for me that I have to blast through.
*I’ve obviously heard people talk about seeding a pull but I never really got this. Now I get it. When I’m in Williamsburg I can seed the idea of Joe’s Pizza to get the girl thinking about it. That way when I go to pull her there she’s more likely to say yes. On the walk to Joe’s Pizza I can seed the idea that I need to go to the bathroom and my house is two blocks away, that way I don’t run into the issue I had last Friday night when I said “Let’s eat the pizza at my place” and the girl give me a shit test. Seeding the pull is going to be a powerful tool in my arsenal once I learn to use it effectively.