Last night ended differently than I thought it would. I met up with my girl for drinks, we had a good time, but then she wouldn’t let me come over. I don’t know whether it’s because she had to work the next day, or because I did something wrong, or what. That definitely affected me though, I felt down and embarrassed to be honest. So I went to a dive bar and drank two Bud Lites. Then I bought a chocolate Sunday from McDonalds and talked to a cop in Union Square for twenty minutes. I got his take on the recent events that are firming up my belief that I don’t want to spend my life in America.

The day was not a total write-off though. Before meeting up with girl I opened two sets in Meatpacking. They both were going good but I ejected. I felt like I was taking up their time and not offering value. I felt incongruent. However, I believe that in time this will go away and I’ll feel good staying in longer. At any rate, I was pleased that I opened these sets alone and I didn’t need my wing man. I really am going to have to train myself to open a lot of sets alone though. I can’t depend on having someone there.

Notes

-Expecting to get laid, then being told you can’t come over sucks. I rarely take rejections personally, but I took that personally.
-Going out is a habit, which makes it easy. Someone asks me are you going to be out next Saturday? I don’t even have to think, the answer is automatically yes.
-I feel about 6% more congruent talking about absolute bullshit. Now, to get that last stubborn 94% down.
-I’m drinking less than normal, even though I’m at a bar or club every single night.
-Rule: if I make eye contact with a girl I have to walk up and open her.

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