I celebrated America’s birthday by having lots of sex. I usually write broad overviews of my night, but since I got laid last night I’ll go into some detail. Maybe someone reading this will gain something of value. Second bar pull of my life, something like 35 or 40 days straight going out. Here we go. If you just want to read about the set where sexy time ensues, skip the first three paragraphs.

I have a beer at the dive bar, waiting for my wingman to get to the city. He arrives and we go to Biergarten. Walk in, three set sitting at the table, I open them without thinking. Once you crush, murder, destroy, and otherwise pulverize approach anxiety, opening sets gets so much easier. So I get to talking to this girl from Westchester. She has a very strong personality and is very logical. She reminds me quite a bit of my ex-girlfriend, who I loved.

Rebecca is super logical. She’s asking me why I came up to talk to her, she’s giving me feedback on how the set is going, she offers to wing me on a set of girls next to us, and then she tells me all about what kind of sex she’s into. Frankly I’m overwhelmed. I’m sick, sort of tired, it’s my first set, and this girl is running laps around me. But we’re having fun and she clearly likes me. After half an hour she states that should I ask for her number, she would go on a date with me. So I get her number, I ask her if I can kiss her, and before she answers I do it. She leaves, taking her two French friends with her.

I talk to my wing man for a minute, then I see two cute girls walk in. I’m like “Open them!” He says “Well let them at least sit down first.” So we give them fifteen seconds to sit down, then he opens them. They turn out to be ok, nothing special. Even though my wing man opened them I took over the set. Then the cuter one drops the boyfriend line, mid-sentence, the way chicks do, and we decide to bounce. To the Brassmonkey!

Brassmonkey, blond girl sitting at the bar right in front. I walk in and make eye contact with her. Hold the contact. She looks away, but I’m already walking straight up to her. Zero hesitation. I don’t remember what I open with but I’m very physical right from the beginning. I can tell she likes me. Within a minute I kiss her on the cheek, then the other cheek, then we start making out. She’s really bad at kissing! That sometimes (often?) means a girl is bad at sex. Too early to think about that though. We vibe and vibe. After ten minutes I’m thinking, I have to move her! Tough spot though. She’s sitting at the bar, so I can’t take her to get a drink. It’s raining so the rooftop is closed. It’s dead and nobody is dancing. So I do something really simple. I just have her stand up and start half dancing, half what-evering, with me right there. It might not be totally moving her but it’s better than nothing.

The set is going really well and I immediately start thinking logistics. Luck is with me, it’s the easiest situation. It’s getting dark outside, there is a huge fireworks display happening in Manhattan, it’s two blocks from her house, which is only 10 minutes by taxi from the bar. I suggest we go check out the fireworks. My wing man doesn’t want to go. He’s talking to the girl’s friend the whole time but I don’t know whether he actually likes her of if he’s just being a good wing man. I pressure him, he assents. We all pile out of the bar, hop into a taxi and take the ride over.

The rest just sort of works out naturally. Me and my new girl make out a lot while fireworks go off. I’m not an especially sappy dude, but making out with fireworks exploding in the background was pretty cool. Finally they end and I’m like “I want to see your apartment.” I don’t even bother with an excuse. If a girl likes you she’s going to hook up with you. As long as you do a few things right, you don’t have to overthink it and try to say a lot of fancy bullshit. I just gently pressure her into showing me her apartment. Which she does, and it’s awesome. She pours us some water, I take a leak, then we go to her bedroom and we fuck four or five times before I leave the next morning. Best of all, it turns out that her being bad at kissing didn’t translate into bad sex. It was great!

Some thoughts. That instant approach is KILLER. Hesitation is bullshit. If a girl likes you, your job isn’t so much to try to do 54 amazing things, it’s more to just not do anything stupid. Girls know the deal, they’ll actively work to make the pull happen. Going out every night is magic pill if there ever was one. So is having a wing man. I’m doing 3x more approaches than when I was going out alone.


-Approach instantly. Just go in, waiting doesn’t make it easier.
-Making out underneath fireworks is pretty cool.
-Two days ago, 8 sets with nothing. Yesterday, 2 sets, make outs in both, and I got laid. The world is a funny place.
-I’ll bet I can get laid again before July is over.
-What can I do to get ever better at this?
-I’m so happy I’m not living 100 years ago, when everyone had way less random sex.