Last night was difficult. My brain was fighting me hard. I was out of state and feeling alone. It’s a week of going out totally alone, and I wonder if it wouldn’t be fun to go out with a wing man at some point? Some people have texted me saying they’d like to go out, but when it comes down to it they’re more interested in the NBA game or playing Xbox then taking action. That’s cool, I get it. But I think I’d like to try going out with a wing.

Anyway, last night started off wrong. I got this club that was having an open vodka bar for an hour. Since I go out in Manhattan this is the only way I can afford to drink. When I get there, an egg shaped bouncer says they won’t be opening the doors for another half hour. Then a railing breaks, a girl goes down and she’s knocked out cold on the sidewalk. I look at the bouncer, the passed out girl surrounded by people, and decide that another club may be better for me.

So I walk thirty blocks to Meatpacking. But the problem with Meatpacking is that on Saturday nights it’s TOO insane. TOO many fucking people, lines at all my favorite clubs. By now I feel weird, I see all these people going out in groups and I’m like what the fuck am I doing? My happy, enjoy the night attitude decides to do an Ernest Hemingway and check out early. But hey, to meet my goal I still have to do one approach. Cute girl sitting on a ledge, texting, obviously waiting for friends. I walk up with a smile and introduce myself.

Five minutes later she says “Goodbye Jason” (my name’s ___) and walks off.

I spend the rest of the night trying to not beat myself up for only doing one approach, and being unable to feel happy and go lucky. I remind myself, several hundred times, that I’m in this for the long haul, and even though I only did one approach, I still got out, and I did meet my goal of talking to at least one girl.

Notes

-I really wouldn’t mind going out with a wing man once in a while.
-Meatpacking on a Saturday is like Bangkok on an average Tuesday: so clogged with people you don’t have room to breathe. Best to skip it entirely unless I’m on a guestlist for something.
-I’m in this for the long haul (60/90/120 day challenge?). Small actions add up to big results.
-Beating myself up mentally isn’t going to solve anything.
-How can I unlock that fun vibe and get into state easier?

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