Last night was a fascinating experience. I was feeling sick, it was raining and I was cold. So I took all of these excuses, threw them in the fucking garbage and went out. I only opened one set before my wingman, who I did daygame with on Monday, showed up. We opened a set or two but nothing really hooked that well. Then my regular wingman showed up and things started to get more interesting. We work well together because we rarely work together. We both canvas the venue and open, and then at some point the other one usually joins the set. In a small place, like we were in last night, I’ll open a set and then thirty seconds later my wingman pops up and is talking to the friend. It’s a great way to canvas a venue and have a blast. Three sets really stand out from last night.
1. A short, rather cute girl. We started talking about what she’s interested in and the conversation got deep. I was asking her all about what her motivations are and why she’s doing what she’s doing. She was telling me and getting more attracted by the second. Starting to lean in to me, massive pupils, and so forth. This is me (like I talked about in this report) not trying to move the interaction towards sex. It’s just having a conversation, being attractive, and letting things fall where they may. I think this is so important and yet it’s taken me this long to realize it. I’ve spent so long pushing for sex that I’ve never taken that step back to ask if there’s a better way. This idea of getting to know a girl without the agenda of sex on the back of my mind has literally hit me in the last few days. I’m still sorting it and wondering what the implications are. Anyways, in this set I started feeling like some shenanigans were in order and I bounced.
2. Beautiful blonde girl, much cuter than I’m used to. Usually I get stifled around a girl this cute and I act like a wimp. Not last night though, I was having a blast! I didn’t care if she stayed or left, so she stayed. We were singing a song, having fun, and at one point I put my arm around her and kept it there. Not in a creepy way though, it was just like something you’d do with your girlfriend. She put her arm around me to and kept it there. This is where we see the idea of baby-steps, tiny bumps up in progress. I’ve never had a girl this attractive be this into me and put her arm around me like that before. Who knows, maybe it’s six months before this is regularly happening. Maybe a year, I don’t know. But just the fact that it happened shows that I’m making progress and am headed in the right direction.
3. For the first time in my life (that I remember haha, I used to drink) I merged a set. Not just any two girls either, I merged two very cute girls with each other. It was a blast. Beyond merging I had no fucking idea what to do and it sort of faded, but hell, baby-steps! It went really well too. The girls took it seriously, they shook hands and said nice things to each other. It showed me just how much potential there is here. And most importantly, this being something I’ve never done before (like my first solo subway open last week), I learned that I won’t be killed. Nobody is going to come in with a Katana and disembowel me. So go for it, do it more!
*I’m putting an active effort into opening everything. That means everything, even the unattractive chicks! The less I can think when I’m at the bar, the more I’ll get into flow state. Right now I’m still using my brain to filter my opens, saying things like “she’s too big” or “she’s with some guys” or “she doesn’t look happy”. It’s all bullshit, I don’t want to be thinking I want to be opening! So while I’m getting much, much better at this, I still have progress to make. Hell, I’m not going to sleep with the ugly girl but I can still talk to her for 30 seconds or use her to merge a set or make her my homebase if I don’t have a wingman. So many opportunities.
*I have to stop leaning in! I don’t know why I have such trouble with this. Maybe it’s just because clubs are loud, I wear earplugs and girls don’t speak loud. That may be true, but I still have to find a way to have a conversation without contorting all over.