Beautiful night it was. I had so much fun that if the government could make it illegal they would. I’m going to write a brief overview then dive into all of the learning experiences. For, despite having an indelible night, there were also dozens of lessons to take from it. It goes like this.
Around 7 I was twenty minutes away from buying a ticket to check out this local club in Greepoint. Then I got a text from my promoter buddy inviting me to a fairly high level club where he’s hosting a table. That’s the easiest yes I’ll ever say in my life. Get there at 10:50, the room is dead. Five minutes later he shows up with some people and we go to his table. Everyone takes a drink, the night takes off and we all party till 2:30 when I leave. The only reason I left was that I had approached, and I’m only exaggerating by the slightest margin, every set in that venue. There was simply nothing else to open. So I left, went to a local PUA mainstay, said what’s up to guys working there, saw zero sets, took the L Train back home.
*Five second makeout. I’m walking around the room, make eye contact with a girl dancing on the table. Key move: I never break eye the initial eye contact. I walk up to her, pull myself up onto the table and we start making out without a word. She’s skinny, short, and weighs as much as a grad student’s backpack. So I grab her and lift her off the table. Now I’m holding her with one arm and she’s got her legs wrapped around me. My other arm is behind my back holding my drink. We make out like this for almost a minute. It’s some gangster stuff. Holding a girl with one arm, making out standing on top of a table. This helped me to become a better person 0% but it was fun as hell.
*I made out with another girl because of persistence. I opened her and she didn’t seem that into it. But what separates a guy who has game from 80% of the pickup community is that the guy with game will keep plowing and more often than not he’ll win the girl over. I just keep talking to her, keep her interested. If she looks or turns away I’ll give her second, then reengage. I kept plowing physically too. I must have gone for that kiss five times before I got it. It was very obvious she wanted to makeout but she needed, well whatever it is girls need, and so I just kept going and finally we ended up making out. She had to work at 8 in the morning so no pull there. Got her number, told her we should hit up the club next week, I’ll introduce her to my promoter friend and she can drink for free. My hunch though is that I won’t see her again. This set was fairly solid but there simply wasn’t enough time to really make it good. If I had half an hour with her that would have been better.
*My promoter buddy has a group of his own promoter friends and I’ve seen them all a couple of times now. One of them is a DJ who plays at some high end clubs and I chatted with him for a few minutes. Here, I give my conversation with him a B-. I didn’t do a very good job relating to him and getting him involved with talking to me. I tried several different angles but it didn’t quite happen. My goal is obviously to get him to invite me out to “see him play” aka “open every set in a high end venue while he spins“. But to do that I need to offer value. Obviously I can throw chicks at him but I think it would be better if I can just have a solid conversation so that he’s interested in seeing me again. Thankfully this is easier when I already have the social proof of seeing him several times. At some point it will probably become like we all roll in the same circle and it’s natural for him to invite me out. I make myself useful.
*In regards to these promoters and DJs I came to realize something last night. This is by no means universal but I think it might apply more of them than one would think. These guys are not actually that socially outstanding. They don’t radiate awesomeness the way a great PUA does. They’re probably not that comfortable speaking to strangers and they might not even be able to have a great conversation with a girl. They depend on social proof. I think that given my last nine or ten months of socializing with strangers, I’m actually more socially savvy than these guys. Again, a certain group of them. I’m positive there are plenty who would kick my ass. But my point is that not all of these guys are social gods, they’re more like right time, right place people.
*This point I just made allowed me to realize something last night. Simply throwing girls at these guys is not that valuable. They don’t know what to do with them! There is a difference between a soft, social proof open and a cold open. The cold open requires more skill. If I throw a girl, who I just cold opened 30 seconds ago, at a guy like this DJ, he probably won’t know how to handle it. It might even make him feel bad which is the opposite of what I want. So I’m seeing that the value here is not really just grabbing random chicks from the club and bringing them in. The real value is befriending chicks so that they like me, then introducing them to these guys. Under that context it’s much more of a social proof open which they can easily handle and it’s good for them. This is a subtle point and one that I really just understood last night. It’s funny, about two or three months ago I actually asked my promoter friend if it’s valuable if I throw random girls at him from the club. He didn’t really know how to answer. I think now that if he could put it into words he would say exactly what I just expressed.
*In a few months I’m going to have access to a lot of good clubs. Maybe not the super high end, but I should have regular access to some very decent places. I can just see it coming together. I don’t know how exactly but it’s going to happen. Ideally I not only have access but I always know someone with a table as well. This leads to the next point.
*Last night I dominated the venue. I met a bunch of people, made out with two girls, and I felt on top of the world. I was a social monster. I’ve done this before but it’s hit or miss. What made it easy last night was having the table. It was my home base and it gave me a strong grounding in the venue. Anytime I was feeling not so amazing I could go back to the table, chat to people, talk to my promoter friend, whatever. That’s great, but the real question is how I can replicate that when I don’t have a table and when I’m going into a venue cold? It would be very helpful to have a home base. Whether that’s a table or even just a big group of people. I should keep this in mind as I continue going out.
*I noticed a lack of that killer fucking instinct with the pull last night. I was grinding on this hot Swedish girl, she was giving me a boner, it was fantastic. But I very consciously noticed myself not going for the pull, or trying to set it up. Lack of belief. I didn’t believe it would happen. This is hard to explain but it’s something like this. All of my pulls to date have been fairly straightforward (good logistics). As a beginner that’s what’s allowed me to get them. However, this situation where I’m dancing with this girl and I don’t know what’s up and she’s with friends and not from this country. This is all the next level of complex. I have no experience making a pull happen under these settings so I have little belief it will. However, I have to hone that. I have to at least fucking try. I have to inculcate a 100% belief that if a girl is talking to me for more than 2 minutes she wants to get pulled. Killer fucking instinct.
*A fuck up. I let that same Swedish girl go and saw her five minutes later talking to some guys. I thought that she was with these guys. Big fuckup as I learned twenty minutes later that they were cunty, miscalibrated PUAs. So I let her be stolen by some fudge-packers that I don’t respect. Obviously two things I can do here. One is keep her engaged next time, don’t let her go in the first place. Lead. Next is that if I see her talking to some guys, I can just go in and ask her how she knows them. If she says that they’re good friends, fine. I don’t need to mess around there. But if she says they just met, fuck that. Grab her hand, spin her, freeze out the guy, engage her and blow them out.
*I had an interesting interaction with a married woman. I was doing my rounds when I made eye contact with her. Straight in, arm around her. Said to her:
“I haven’t seen you in forever. It’s literally been forever, I’ve never seen you before.”
She thinks this is great. She looks like she’s about to grab my head and mouth rape me. Then she says that she’s married, she has a husband. Sure enough, he shows up twenty seconds later. The situation is this. I have my arm around his wife. She’s smiling at me with doe eyes, and this poor cunt walks up and just stands there looking disengaged with life. He doesn’t even look at me or ask what the fuck I’m doing. I felt bad for the woman. What a pile of wet paper she was married to! I don’t judge a guy on whether he does pickup or not. That matters not. But a guy should have something going for him, some spark. Some little sign of life that shows he’s engaged. This poor man, he looked liked the most exciting aspect of his life is when a new TV series comes out. I probably could have walked away with his wife and he wouldn’t have said a word.
*Traditional wisdom dictates that calling a girl is better than texting when you want to set up a date. I’m questioning this. This may have been true ten years ago but I’m beginning to believe that things have changed and women may actually prefer to just text and not call. For example, my twenty-something sister never ever wants to talk on the phone. Even for important shit she would rather text. Then there was a girl I met two months ago, I kept trying to call her to set up a date but she never responded. She only texted. Finally, I’ve never had a girl flake because I texted to set up a date. I just get the feeling that the world has changed and that texting for a date is just as good as calling. Anyone have thoughts on this?
*Overall a sick night. Lot of things coming together to make it so cool and I’m super excited to have more nights like this. Tonight is Friday and that means Le Bain. Time to kick some ass and pull!