Last night I had lots of chemistry with a very cute girl and we made out. That’s makeouts three nights in a row which has never ever happened before. This interaction also held lots of lessons that I can directly apply to future girls. It went like this. It’s me, Michael and Obi chilling at Michael’s place. Obi has solid game and he filled me in with all his conquests on Tinder, it was funny. Meeting up with a girl and you need to get her back to your place? “I forgot my wallet, we have to go back to my place”. Brilliant. I don’t imagine it will always work, but when it does it’s clean and simple.
It’s Berlin so we chill and don’t even head out till 2am. The plan is to go to a club called Area, but we get sidetracked. Walking down the sidewalk I make eye contact with a girl who is standing with her two friends. I hold the eye contact and walk straight up to her. I have no fucking idea what she looks like, all I know is that we’ve made eye contact, held it, and she must be opened. I have no idea what I said to her but it must have been alright because we start talking. Obi and Michael start talking to the other two girls.
It turns out she’s Israeli and she’s cute. As we’re talking I can consciously feel when I’m being attractive or not. Example. I’ll start to lean forward, invest more in her, ask a question or two. My posture is a bit worse, my tonality is a bit worse, I’m speaking a bit faster, and I can see her close down at bit. So I straighten up, lean back away from her, speak slower, and make a statement. She turns to jelly and starts investing in me. This was really interesting because I don’t know that I’ve ever been quite so consciously aware of my behavior and how that affects attraction. Next level stuff.
Eventually we get some beers and sit outside the convenience store and talk. I find out my girl speaks Russian. Attraction up, for both of us. I’m being physical and I don’t know whether it happened there or the next place, but eventually a song comes on that I know, I grab both her hands as if we’re going to dance, then I pull myself into her and kiss her. Then I do it again. And this continues as we makeout for the next hour. But she’s very reluctant. She keeps saying stuff like “we just met” and “Americans are so free with their behavior”. Whatever. She does tell me that she thinks I’m very cute. We part at 5am after 3 hours together. The sky is rolling from black to swarthy blue, and that’s it, a single set night. That being said, I learned some valuable lessons.
The first is outer game. With this girl last night I had enough attraction (inner game good) to go for the makeout within a few minutes. But I didn’t know how to physically make it happen. What I should have done after 5 minutes is what it took me an hour to do. Grab her hands as if we’re going to dance, either pull her in or pull myself in and go for the kiss. This way of going for the makeout is very smooth and even if she rejects the kiss, it’s easy to write it off.
Also, I again noticed that making statements is powerful. It causes me to invest less and it’s a more natural expression of what I really want to say. Of course I ask questions too and listen to what she has to say. But my game needs balancing and with makeouts three nights in a row, the power of statements is obvious. In that same vein, I need to continue to be consciously aware of when I start investing in the girl. When my posture gets a little less great, I lean in, and so forth. If I notice this start happening that’s ok, but I have to stop, take a second, get back to my center, even just ignore the girl for a moment. Then continue. Powerful stuff.
-I was able to speak to this girl for hours last night because of my huge number of life experiences. Living in Russia, speaking Russia, visiting Thailand, having spoken with Israeli girls before, and so forth.
-My outer game needs to catch up with my inner game.
-Totally hooked on statements. I’ve even going to memorize three statements that I can whip out anytime I have a brainfart and the interaction is going down and I just need to say something quick.
-Confidence is peaking, I like the way he’s speaking, don’t like the baggy jeans but I’m gonna like what’s underneath them. He’s my American boy. My theme song, except that I only wear skinny jeans.