If there is one thing I think that I’m doing wrong at the moment, I’m not pushing the interaction far enough. I’m not consistently bringing a sexual vibe and making it clear what my intentions are. It’s interesting that I’ve talked a lot about how I should be less physical, because now I feel like I’m not being physical enough. I’m searching for that perfect balancing point.
Biggest mistake of last night, walked up to two girls sitting down. Spoke for a while with them, they seemed cool. I noticed they were all out of drinks but I never tried to move them to a new venue! That was fucking stupid because after 15 minutes the conversation died out. There was no forward progression. Who the fuck knows if they would have followed us to a new venue, but the mistake was in not trying.
Another set I noticed that one girl was giving me lots of IOIs but the friend was there and she was judgement heavy. I suspect that my girl would have been down for a lot if she was free of the friend. I left that set but if I could redo it I would stay with my girl and be fairly platonic. However, I would stick it out for as long as possible, then go for the number. I think I could get a fairly high success rate doing that. The more I go out, the more comfortable I feel staying in sets longer, the better things go.
High End Clubs
Unlike other NYC guys, I have put almost zero focus onto getting into good clubs with hotter women. I’ve not done it for several reasons. The first are run of the mill insecurities, not feeling like I belong there or not feeling like I am worthy of hitting promoters up. All that typical stuff. Of course that can all be overcome, but I haven’t worked on it because it’s my belief that I can learn the most important lessons at any bar or club. Namely: approach often, approach hard sets, stay in set, go for the pull, maintain good eye contact, don’t lean in, etc. It doesn’t matter where you are, you can practice this stuff.
That being said, it’s reaching the point where I think there would be some real benefits to getting into high end clubs. I could approach more women, talk to more attractive women, and I’d be inclined to stay out longer. Whether I actually choose to put in the effort to make this happen, who knows. I plan on going to SEA in November which isn’t that far away. But for damn sure, the next time I plan on living in a city for more than 6 months, I’ll make an active effort to find a way into the best clubs.
A guy on a forum said that “To be advanced is to be advanced in the basics” as in eye contact, tonality, etc. I think this is an awesome quote and it resonates with me. My fundamentals are reaching new levels, especially my eye contact and posture. Still room for improvement, but they’ve never been better.