Had an above average Tuesday. We approached quite a few sets and things went fairly well. Still, I think that I can learn a lot from where I messed up.
*I opened some cute girls and my wingman came in later. I had my girl, he had the friend. The vibe was pretty good, my girl was cool but she wouldn’t let me kiss her. After a while me and my wingman switched girls. Now I’m with the friend. This caused me to feel uncertain. Am I just keeping her socially warmed up or is this game time and my job is to escalate and make it happen? Being conservative I was just social, no escalation. The result? Some pickup artist with better game than me came in and swooped her. OK, so next time if I switch with my wingman I just go for it. Even as the original girl watches.
*Started the night by opening some cute girls from Florida. Initially I was talking to two then one faded, leaving me to talk to the cuter one. It was going good but I could see her slowly inching back towards her large group. Instead of taking action I just left the set. I think that what I needed to do was introduce myself to the group, say a few pleasantries and then (now as a member of the group) keep talking to my girl. I think that would have let the conversation go on for quite a while.
I will have to consciously force myself to do this group introduction. I have a few insecurities here. I feel like all the guys in the group are going to dislike me and the whole thing is a waste of time. I need to trash that useless point of view, assume that I’m the one with value, I’m the opportunity, and everyone there is lucky to meet me!
*In several sets I was consciously aware of some annoying behavior I was exhibiting. I was fidgeting, shifting weight from foot to foot and otherwise dispelling sexual tension and acting like a nervous beta. Subtle shit but shit nonetheless. Becoming aware of it, I was able to chill the fuck out and shut that all off for about a minute. I noticed an immediate change in how the girl looked at me. Then I lost it again and things returned to normal. That’s OK though, I’m now more aware of how these bad microexpressions and I can focus on removing them.
*I give my wingman kudos for getting us to do a ballsy approach. We looked through a window and saw a bar with five people in it, all sitting down. Two cute girls, three drunk dudes. My natural instinct was to ignore this, my wingman insisted we do it. So fuck it, I walk in and tap the cuter girl on the shoulder. She turns around and we start to have a good conversation. After a few minutes I get her to stand up. Brilliant stuff, shows I learned my lesson from Friday night. However, after talking for a bit, she wanders off to get another drink. Then she never comes back, she sort of hovers around the drunk dudes. I interpret this to mean she doesn’t like me and I call the night quits. In retrospect I think she wanted me to get her back, to reengage her. So next time when she wanders off, I make the effort to bring her back in.
*I am no longer phased when a girl mentions a boyfriend. If the interaction is going good and she’s giving me positive signs I just keep plowing. I treat it as though she never mentioned another guy. I don’t think I’ve slept with a girl who has a boyfriend yet but it’s bound to happen at some point. After all the wonderful shit I’ve gone through to reach even a modicum of talent, I feel 0% bad about this.