I was watching a brilliant video by the marvelous Jordan Peters and he brought up an interesting idea, what is your criteria for success? I immediately thought about pickup. I’ve thought about my criteria before but I don’t know that I’ve ever gotten to the root of it. I’ll attempt to do that now.
My criteria for success is to be able to go to a new place and sleep with several attractive women in a week. Further, it’s the ability to attract a stunning woman, feel confident with and have the option to date her. I want to be such an outstanding person that she’s chasing me instead of the other way around. I mention feeling confident with her because it’s conceivable that you end up in a situation where you’re sleeping with an attractive woman that you don’t feel you deserve. I wrote an entire post about my experience with this.
What success is not to me is sleeping with the most women (talked about this here). If I sleep with 150 women before finding one that I want to spend my life with, I will consider that no different than if it happens at a laycount of 100 or 200.
Why I Got Into Pickup
I got into pickup because I never got laid in high school. Not only was I incapable of procreation, I had massive insecurities around it. Having to lie about being a virgin at 20 sucks hard, I swore I would not 21 without hooking up with a girl. So I took a bootcamp, did a 30 day challenge, went back to college and met a super chill guy who helped me to get laid with Nataly.
Despite being with close to two dozen women at this point, I’ve still been carrying that insecurity around with me. It’s been a powerful motivating force and without it I may never have gotten into pickup, which has done so much to improve my life. However, I believe that at some point one needs to drop the insecurity and find motivation in other places. If I’m still insecure even after I’ve slept with more girls than all of my high school buddies combined, that seems sort of stupid. Also, who cares? It’s not like anybody I went to high school reads my blog or even knows what I’m doing. I haven’t talked to most of those guys in half a decade.
At any rate, I don’t see myself doing pickup for life. Ultimately I see it as a means to an end which is to find a stunning girlfriend and perhaps wife or baby mama who I live with. My criteria for success is that when I choose that woman she’s beautiful, intelligent, enjoys the same things as me. Until then, I’ll continue screwing girls in the bathroom of Le Bain.